Ten years ago, I was broken. Fresh out of a divorce. Carrying shame I didn’t yet have language for.
Feeling like a failure because I had given everything I had and it still wasn’t enough.
In 2016, it felt like my life collapsed all at once. I wasn’t just grieving a marriage.I was stuck in a toxic workplace that drained what little energy I had left. Disconnected from myself. Disconnected from joy.
So I numbed. I drank. I partied. I gave my body to moments that let me forget—just for a second—how deeply I hurt.
Back then, I thought I was self-destructing. Now I understand: I was surviving. What broke me the most wasn’t just the divorce or the job. It was the realization that everything I had been told would bring happiness… didn’t.
The marriage. The career. The money. None of it saved me.
I was exhausted. Disillusioned. And staring at a future I couldn’t yet imagine.
But something shifted in that darkness. I started to see patterns I had never questioned before. Overgiving. Self-sacrifice. Self-abandonment. Hustling myself into burnout and calling it strength.
I wasn’t broken. I was repeating what I had been taught. What I had watched the women before me endure. What had been normalized in my lineage.
And that’s when I made a decision—one that would quietly change everything. Everything I had watched the women before me survive…I would no longer normalize.
The cycles would not continue through me. They would end with me.
The next ten years were not pretty. They were filled with falling down and getting back up. With grief, rage, tears, and deep healing. With unlearning survival. With choosing myself even when it felt terrifying.
It wasn’t fast. It wasn’t linear. And it certainly wasn’t easy.
But it was honest. And now—here I am. Not perfect. Not finished. But grounded.At peace in a way I never thought was possible.
I didn’t just rebuild my life. I changed its direction.
So I’ll ask you the same question I’m sitting with right now: What have the last ten years brought you? And what patterns have you broken along the way?
If you feel called, comment on this email and let me know.
I’d love to hear your story.
With love,
Dr. Jasmine The Queen of Reinvention
Founder of The Courage Crew | Spiritual Neuroscientist
P.S. This week, I’m releasing something I’ve been building quietly for a long time:
The Relationship Pattern Quiz.
This isn’t a “what’s your attachment style?” quiz. And it’s not about labeling you or telling you what’s “wrong.” This quiz is designed to help you uncover:
The core relationship pattern you’re repeating (even when you’ve done the work)
The generational wound driving that pattern—often rooted in survival, overgiving, or self-abandonment
Why awareness alone hasn’t been enough to change it
And the truth you need to hear to begin interrupting the cycle—for good
If you’ve ever found yourself thinking:
Why do I keep ending up here again?
Why do I give so much and still feel unseen?
Why do healthy relationships feel unfamiliar—or even unsafe?
This quiz will help you connect the dots between your nervous system, your lineage, and the choices you’ve been making in love. Because patterns don’t end through willpower. They end through understanding—and safety.
Keep an eye on your inbox. This one is for the cycle breakers.